Robert Trout (00:02.326)
All right, welcome to the podcast. Everyone, today’s episode is with a very dear colleague and friend of mine, Joanna Lilly. And we’re here today because parent trainers kind of got started from a conversation that we were having in Joanna’s kitchen a long time ago. And it was kind of this birthing moment of the idea of how do we do this? How does the work that we do?
with families adapt and change in both of our professional fields, kind of moving into the future. But welcome, Joanna. Thanks for doing this.
Joanna Lilley (00:41.508)
Thanks for having me, Robert. I’m excited.
Robert Trout (00:43.918)
Yeah, well, I’m nervous because you never know where these conversations are gonna go. But, um, you know, I, talking about the origin story of this idea, what I remember very clearly is kind of just being pushed by you. And I mean, what do you remember about the conversations we were having that day about supporting families and work? What’s your memory?
bring back.
Robert Trout (01:18.731)
Hahaha!
Joanna Lilley (01:18.825)
commiserating around, you know, jokes aside, like, right, the work that we do and people out there know that, right? A lot of the work that we do is with parents. Yes, there is an identified, you know, family member that ends up being kind of the focus or the focal point to the work. But the reality is, when you see real change, it comes from everybody doing work. And sometimes even saying that.
The whole family needs to do work. It does not compute for parents specifically. And that’s no knock at parents, right? Again, their focus is, yes, you’re right. My child needs to change. There are things that we as a family need to do differently, but sometimes the understanding of what that actually, like the heavy lifting that needs to be done, the stretching of the brain that needs to be done. Anyways, I digress.
Robert Trout (01:51.115)
Yes.
Joanna Lilley (02:11.04)
I think that was, we were both at a point where it was like, how else do we get more, I don’t want to call it systemic change, but it kind of feels like it. How do we get more to the masses? Because the work that we’re doing sometimes feels a little bit like a starfish story of like, great, we’re helping this one family. But how do we, how do we think bigger than the lens that we have right now in this moment? And
Robert Trout (02:22.381)
Yeah.
Joanna Lilley (02:39.984)
I appreciate that historically I have challenged you. Right now I don’t feel like I have that level of creativity, but I’m glad that the spark existed back then. But I know that was, I remember, the one thing I remember vividly is that it really, like the light bulb kind of went off for you. I remember you being like, hmm, I wonder how this would look, right? So that’s where my memory lies.
Robert Trout (02:46.547)
Always.
Robert Trout (03:05.098)
Yep. Well, well, let’s pause for a second because, uh, you know, my bio and everything is on the website and people are kind of coming to the podcast because of myself and the team and kind of the work that we do as parent trainers and like stepping into those really difficult situations, but nobody knows you yet. Uh, so we’ll, we’ll get your information on here for sure, but
Why don’t you explain why were you and I sitting at a table talking? So what’s your job and your role with families and kind of how do we, how back then were we corresponding with each other? Why don’t you give that story to everybody? What do you do?
Joanna Lilley (03:41.9)
Yeah, that’s great, great question. So my title is therapeutic consultant and I think sometimes that still is, well, I shouldn’t say I think. I know that it is still not something that families are associating with who I am and what I do or like that being the type of person that they need. Regardless, I am.
Robert Trout (03:54.519)
Ha ha
Joanna Lilley (04:05.476)
A consultant that is hired by the family, completely independent in programs to help support a young adult looking for something, dot, dot. A majority of my clients are looking for some level of supportive programming or therapeutic resources, and that could be from outpatient services all the way up to diverting a hospital situation and looking for a residential level of care. And to…
again tie in to parent trainers. A lot of the work that I do is yes, it’s helping the young adult get connected to what they need, but oftentimes it is connecting parents with the resources too, because I’m very clear that we’re talking about several layers of changes. Yes, I need to get your young adult into care, and I wanna have rapport with the young adult directly, which is partly why I work with young adults only. They are legally adults, so I wanna be able to connect with them and allow them to feel like they have a voice.
But more importantly, there’s also an individuation process. There’s a lot of expectations that are on the line, not just being okay, but also the future of how will you be in life as an independent or interdependent adult? And so there’s a lot of complexity to it, and I love it. Now, to answer your second question of how the heck were even connected, well, for a while, I also lived in the middle of nowhere, Colorado, which I missed dearly.
But you were the closest professional, which was actually an amazing thing because you and I would, you know, maybe once a quarter or something like that, we would switch, where are you coming? Are you coming to me or am I coming to you? But we collaborated with a lot of families. And I found that as a consultant very beneficial, specifically for Experiential Healing Institute, that was just beneficial because I knew that the parents were being trained.
which then had its ripple effect on their participation in programming if there was a program that their child was going to. And then also the young adult was noticing ways in which that their parents were acting differently. And then selfishly for me as a consultant, I wasn’t being pulled into a parent coaching role, which you all are not just parent coaches. It’s such a different experience, but that was…
Joanna Lilley (06:30.756)
That was like my go-to, right? It still is. Like, hey, I need you to consider this because this is such an important experience to be trained on how to actually parent. And…
Robert Trout (06:37.35)
Yeah. Maybe, maybe I should step in on that for a second just for the listener that doesn’t know the history. Parent Trainers is an evolution company, meaning that we used to be called the Experiential Healing Institute, or that company is separate, I should say, like its model was we would fly worldwide.
Train families in their homes and build plans and programming for them to work with their loved one But like you said earlier, it was very individual like we can only do that so many times a year So the idea or the evolution of that is how do we take that concept of training? Which is very different from coaching and move it over to okay. How do we reach?
Thousands of families and make it more affordable and accessible is the word that keeps coming up for all of us as we evolve So eh I still out there and it’s its own thing But parent trainers is kind of this next like how did this get started? And that’s what we’re talking about It’s like the origin story of okay. Eh, I has to change the model has to be different to reach the mass So just for the listener to know that transition. That’s what we’re talking
Joanna Lilley (07:55.128)
Well, I think it’s helpful too, because as you’re even just talking about it right now, I’m just thinking the accessibility is like that’s that is the positioning place that we as entrepreneurs, let’s just strip it down to what it is. We are business owners. We need to understand ways to help continue to help families, but make it so that we can help families that aren’t in the one percent or aren’t, you know, in continuous treatment for an extended period, because it really is.
The mental health struggle is a much wider net cast. And so we’re really missing the opportunity. And I’m saying we, meaning you. I actually direct, I think that there’s an opportunity and this is also selfishly kind of where my challenge to you at that time came. Look, I would love to divert families from having to hire me in the first place.
Robert Trout (08:34.22)
Yes.
Joanna Lilley (08:49.332)
unless they’ve done training first, right? Go through this training first. It’s only gonna cost you a fraction of what it would cost to hire me and then subsequently pay for whatever kind of treatment or supports or resources you need. See if this moves the needle. If this moves the needle, then you’ve just saved yourself a lot of money and you’re walking away with some amazing skills.
Robert Trout (09:13.315)
Yes. Yep.
Joanna Lilley (09:14.82)
So clearly I’m biased. Ha!
Robert Trout (09:21.91)
We’re coming out of a very small industry, let’s be honest, like working in programs and interventions and recovery centers and boarding schools and all those types of programming. It’s very small when you look at the whole of what people are trying to find help and support within. So when I look at this, it’s really like, okay, I’m gonna leave that over there because that’s its own world.
What about everybody else? They don’t even know that exists and they may not be able to afford it or they don’t actually need that or et cetera. So it really is this question of how do we make skills but not like skills that you’re gonna like read from a book but like, how do you stand? What do you say? Why is it working? Neurological tricks, foundationals of interventions and all the things that we know how to do. How can we teach that so the families never reach that crisis?
You know, that’s kind of the ultimate dream that came out of the conversation that you and I had as far as the origin story was, why does it have to get so bad? Before they, any family looks and says, oh, we should probably do something about this. So to me, a huge part of this is how do I make this accessible so that when a parent is out there and they’re saying, okay, we’re dealing with some stuff, how can we turn this around so that we don’t reach that critical mass?
Well, how do we do that? Well, if they can do these online trainings and listen to this podcast and have access to a community to ask those questions and get individual feedback from their supervisory coaching model that we do, et cetera, if we can package it in such a way where it’s like, great, we just stopped a family from reaching that point of no return where they can’t handle this themselves. So not only do I wanna reach everybody that doesn’t know about the world
evolving from and coming over here to be more standalone and independent. But I want to be able to say, Hey, you know, your kids stole $5,000 from you. Guess what? That’s just the beginning. It’s amazing. Excuse me. It’s amazing how many families will have some situation where literally I’ve had this conversation so many times where it’s like, Oh, well, it’s not that bad yet. Right.
Robert Trout (11:46.094)
And my head just explodes a little bit and goes, well, maybe to you it’s not that bad. And the story you just told me of the last, you know, 30 minutes of venting is, it started here and then it became this and then it became this and then it became that. And in their minds, they keep running into that, oh, well, this is the worst it could get, right? And the answer is no, this is not the worst it can get. Like so many things are happening.
Joanna Lilley (12:09.562)
care.
Robert Trout (12:14.434)
with neurodiverse populations, brain development, like different interventions, addictions are happening at a very high rate within social media where families are like, oh, it’s just social media. It’s like, no, that’s an addicted brain pattern. So, you know, things like that are so frustrating for us as professionals, I think you’re shaking your head because you’re like, oh yeah, I see this too. And I think that’s…
It’s kind of like you were joking earlier, like we met in your kitchen and probably the first hour we joked and that like, Oh my God, frustration way. Because how do we convince people or how do we educate them? Maybe is even a better way of looking at it. How do we get them to wake up? That yeah, you’re not a therapist. You’re not a professional in the, you know, the therapeutic field. We get it. And come on, you’re a parent. You should know the basics of
what’s happening for your kid and their brain and what they’re going to need in a month and six months and a year, just the basics will help so much getting you through this process. But I think in a lot of ways, the work that we do and the evolutions that we make are from the frustrations that eventually wake us up and say, okay, I’ve got to reach these people earlier, or okay, this family needs this thing, not me, that kind of thing. So.
Joanna Lilley (13:40.228)
Yeah, completely. I mean, that’s my, as you’re talking, the two things that came up, I just like am totally picturing the frog in the pot of boiling water. That is how I visualize most of the families that I work with at this point, because they don’t realize how things are heating up. And it’s really important for me and you in this regard to not…
ring the alarm bell and yet we have to say something, right? Like the parent is either going to listen or the parents will either hear us or they’ll notice if we’re holding up a mirror so they can see their reflection of like, oh yeah, this is bad. Or they will continue to sit in that pot of boiling water until it gets a heck of a lot worse. And then at that point, um,
Robert Trout (14:13.63)
Yeah.
Joanna Lilley (14:35.372)
you know, unfortunately we’re still here. We’re just dealing with a bigger mess to kind of unpack and help them settle long before in a reactive space. But then, okay, sidebar, the other thing that I was gonna say too is, I mean, this is also, as you’re just describing, like, how do we get more out there? I mean, that’s why I started my podcast. Not that I necessarily wanted to do a shameless plug about my podcast, but I feel like you teed this up perfectly, so now I just have to say it.
Robert Trout (14:59.484)
Go for it. Yep, go for it. Yes.
Joanna Lilley (15:03.14)
The whole reason why I started the Success is Subjective podcast, it came out of my own frustrations of parents thinking that their child’s experience was an anomaly. And I was like, wait, hold on, I worked in higher education? Like I tour all these programs, every program that I tour, at least one staff is saying, that’s my story. You know, like I dropped out or I didn’t go or I went to the military or I went back to college when I was 30. I mean, it’s just like…
Nobody’s story is linear. You’re not supposed to know at 18 what you’re gonna do the rest of your life. You will experience adversity. How do you handle it? College is actually really hard. It’s not necessarily fun, unless you find balance and structure and you’re motivated. It can be fun once you get there, but if you go to college not thinking, oh, I just signed up for more schooling, I’m driving the bus now, rather than the K-12 system saying I have to be here, otherwise I’m…
I mean, it is, there’s just so much to unpack there. And normalizing that what success looks like is very different for everybody in trying to kind of spread the word of like, your story is not unusual. It’s actually really common and you’re gonna be okay. Like you will be okay if you lean into whatever resources you need for as a parent, you’re going to be okay because your identity that is probably tied to your child
and what it is that they’re doing and where they’re going. You gotta separate that and you gotta be okay with just learning to accept the journey that there are.
Robert Trout (16:38.96)
Yep. Well, first of all, we’re going to have to do a podcast episode for our podcast about your podcast.
Joanna Lilley (16:50.004)
about the podcast about the podcast.
Robert Trout (16:50.986)
That’s right. Yeah, I think that’ll be great. But I, you know, you and I get very passionate about so many things about the work that we do, I think, because we’ve done it for so long. And we see the places, we see the blind spots, right. And I think that’s where we get frustrated is because to us, it’s so simple. And to families, I have to constantly remind myself that
Joanna Lilley (17:14.841)
Yeah.
Robert Trout (17:20.598)
They, they’re not looking for this. So why would they ever see this blind spot? They have no construct of what’s happening in that pattern. So I, it makes me slow down, have empathy and look at it. But I also have to acknowledge for myself, right? Like from my therapeutic background and et cetera, where it’s like, I, if I assume that this family is fully capable of
Joanna Lilley (17:45.284)
Yeah.
Robert Trout (17:50.514)
Um, understanding what’s going on for them, then I’ve already lost because first of all, if they’ve made it to the point that they’re listening to this podcast or they’re calling us or hiring us for anything, they missed something and they’re looking for those pieces that they missed. Um, so we have to be the ones to supply the content and the training and education that allows that to happen or to lead them to someone like you where it’s like, Hey,
you’re past the point of no return, which is sometimes just what a family wants to know, right? It’s like, wait a minute, how bad are we? They just want to know on the spectrum, have we reached the point that we’re not able to do this? And that’s where it’s like, okay, here’s Joanna. Take this and it’s time for you to find the resources and the structures and programs, right? So, but let me back up to this project, the parent trainers project.
specifically, I’m curious, what do you hope this becomes? Since you saw that light bulb turn on to the reality that it exists now, like we’re online, we have the podcast, we have the community building, we have so many hours of training available for families anytime that they can buy and watch at their convenience, etc. Like it’s all there. So what do you hope it becomes now that it’s real?
Joanna Lilley (19:12.3)
Yay, now that it’s launched. My hope, honestly, is that it kind of catches like wildfire in terms of, again, the accessibility, the information, because going back to the structure of EHI, if I called you, because I had a family, you might say like, yep, we can get out there this week, or it might be like, ah, we can’t get out there for three weeks, and usually, if I’m immediately being hired for a family, sometimes…
Robert Trout (19:14.136)
Yes.
Joanna Lilley (19:40.596)
I’m simultaneously looking for resources for the young adult and saying that the family needs this. They needed this years ago, but they need you now. And sometimes that availability doesn’t exist. And that’s, I mean, that is, it’s a great problem to have, right, as a business owner. And it’s also, it’s an, it’s also an issue as a business owner. Like, hey, I am not available to provide these services in this moment when I would like to.
And then you’re juggling, well, do I bring on more trainers? But then if I bring on more trainers, then what if all of a sudden I don’t have the demand that exists at the time? So you’re constantly assessing and reassessing that. So going back to parent trainers, my hope is to be able to actually make this really easy for families to get connected to, financially, culturally, and just in terms of the content. So for that,
hey, here’s this resource, go do this, and then come back to me. It actually allows me to have a little bit of a buffer. Again, similar to what I was doing with EHI, but now it’s a like, well now you can do it from the comfort of your home. If you don’t wanna do EHI, right? Or if you’re like, oh, that’s not necessarily what I need, well great, go follow this. Get connected to the community. Lean into the podcast, read what you’ve got.
See if you can implement some changes, right? Under the structure and support of some of these trainers. If that moves the needle again, then you don’t need me. I would love to be able to work myself completely out of the job. The reality is we know that a lot of parents again, are still in that pot of boiling water and may not realize how awful things are getting. Ideally more families would be proactive and be able to get out of the water.
And then, you know, that would be the easy translation of getting connected to parent trainers, but not everybody’s gonna pay attention, right? Like for whatever reason, they just like being in that boiling water. I don’t know why, but then it gets to that point where they’re like, if they get connected to me, like it’s go time, but I would love to have a lot less families that would be in that reactive space, but instead rather be connected to parent trainers, have the resource and either it works and they don’t need me
Robert Trout (21:44.858)
Yep.
Joanna Lilley (21:56.816)
It has helped, but it’s also helped them proactively understand, you know what? We see the writing on the wall that our young adults still needs some support. And we want to bring on a consultant to help navigate this now, right? Let’s get connected to the right resources now before it becomes a crisis. That would be my dream, right? Like the parent of the young adult that is still living at home, not showering, addicted to tech, you know, like not employed, not going to school, but
Robert Trout (22:16.612)
Right.
Joanna Lilley (22:25.976)
that parent vacillates, right? But they’re not doing drugs or like, but he’s not, he’s so kind. If I do ask him to do that, if I ask him to do chores, like he will do them for the most part. I might be mad about it, but he’ll get it done. Yeah, maybe, maybe. Those are the families that I would love to really understand things that they can do differently earlier before it becomes
Robert Trout (22:38.042)
Eventually.
Joanna Lilley (22:55.944)
that sense of emergency for those types of young adults. And again, my lens is obviously young adults. So I keep saying that, but for them, it becomes a real crisis when then all of a sudden the young adult is saying like, you know, I’m feeling suicidal or like, you know, I’m expressing some sort of anger or frustration projected toward parents. And they were like, what have we ever done?
Robert Trout (23:00.25)
Yeah.
Robert Trout (23:19.724)
Yeah. Yes.
Joanna Lilley (23:19.928)
Now we’re trying to unpack what happened for the last three years of a sedentary, unmotivated life, which is super challenging for me as a consultant. But again, ideally the parents are getting connected to you all earlier, understanding how to make changes now, rather than waiting until it gets messy.
Robert Trout (23:39.334)
Well, I’ll translate because your lenses young adults as you say these things it’s so easy to see the patterns right because you’re saying the young adult that’s in the basement playing tech all the time, you know, etc. I look at that and translate to okay now I’m looking at a 13 year old school refusal staying at home bullying the parent into submitting to like oh you can’t make me go and then
it becomes, you know, now a 17 year old that’s playing video games all day. And then when you take the controller, they’re in your face doing this, or they negotiate to death, right? The lawyer syndrome, you know, all those kinds of things. It’s like a young adult, 16 year old. I mean, are the clients traditionally for us start around six, seven, eight, like we see these patterns develop at the early ages that
Joanna Lilley (24:18.105)
Yeah.
Robert Trout (24:31.978)
make that young adult that you end up working with is just that along the way there was this, I call it the new normal mindset, where the parent gets used to. The kid trains the family to see what’s happening is just the family’s new normal. So there’s no urgency. There’s no crisis because the family just goes, oh, that’s just Frank. It’s just what we do every day.
And it becomes normal. That is one of the most detrimental things ever because the family then later wakes up to usually in some form of crisis, right? It’s like, Oh, wait a minute, hold on. We missed something. And they’re like, Oh, well he’s 23 and, and something must’ve happened. And I raised my hand and go, can we flash back to when he was seven? Please. Like, I mean, you want to really talk about what we’re trying to get at. We’re.
We’re talking about skill sets and interventions that need to happen young to prevent what we’re getting to when they’re young adults or mid teens or whatever it might be, wherever they, the parents starts to wake up from the fog of war is really the metaphor there. It’s like, wait a minute, what’s happening? How did we get here? This is not what I wanted. And that’s where the parents show up, right? But I, you know, there’s this whole awakening.
Joanna Lilley (25:45.547)
Yeah.
Robert Trout (25:58.606)
process that I hope to target with parent trainers around, okay, if you’re a seven-year-old doing this, and this, do this training, start putting in structure, interventions, and boundaries, and process, and that way when they’re 13, you’ve got them kind of working with you, and the parent has some semblance not of control, but of process. We’re not trying to create control. We’re trying to create process where the parent goes, oh, I see you.
This is what’s going on, and I’m going to teach you and educate you and get you ready because guess what? When you’re 18, I’m going to lose a sense of power, and that individuation leaves you to need to be competent. And that’s if they don’t do that, that’s where you come in.
Robert Trout (26:49.883)
Oh, there’s so much, right?
Joanna Lilley (26:50.192)
So it really, yeah, I was gonna say, it comes back to that meeting in the kitchen where the thought was, how do we get in front of, it really is, it’s like this Benjamin Button type situation, right? Of like, how do we get, instead of dealing or commiserating about the parent of the 21-year-old or the 19-year-old, it’s like, how do we, how do you, as a…
Robert Trout (27:08.264)
Absolutely.
Joanna Lilley (27:17.288)
as a business, right? Like how do you shift to provide what you’re doing for the parents of the elementary school aged young people so that it completely diverts the path or the trajectory that they’re on through adolescence into young adulthood that you and I could literally sit down and we can predict based on how things are playing out now. Or again, we can do kind of the reverse of, okay.
this 21 year old, let’s talk about where they were at 17. Where were they at 15? What was 13 like, right? What was 10? And then we can see, you and I can see the patterns of like, oh, really like palm to the fist, palm to the forehead. I obviously know anatomy. Woo, all right. It’s, I haven’t had enough coffee apparently. It is a palm to the forehead moment for parents of like,
Robert Trout (28:00.22)
I’m sorry.
Joanna Lilley (28:12.216)
man, if only somebody had stopped you right there and helped like coach you in that moment, educate you in that moment, how that would be the pebble in the pond, right? That ripple effect impacting that entire family dynamic, communications, boundaries, just the individuation process as the young adult, again, that’s my lens, is growing up, it would lead to a very different situation.
I would not be getting those phone calls. And again, I’m totally fine to work myself out of a job. In fact, I’d prefer it. I will say that my hats off to the higher education, the business of higher education, because that is what actually is gonna continue to keep me employed because so many people, I mean, this is like a sidebar conversation, college, but then they get to college and it just, you know, it unravels. And that’s where, those are my favorite clients to work with, but that is a little bit,
Robert Trout (28:45.64)
Yeah.
Joanna Lilley (29:09.508)
tangential to what it is that you’re talking about if parents parented differently, right? Or if they learned some ways to support their child way earlier. Actually, it might even change the trajectory of, you know, college isn’t for everybody. You don’t have to go to college if you’re feeling that pressure. Hey, let’s explore alternative options. If you wanna go to college when you’re 21, that’s totally okay. You’re not gonna be off track if you don’t go when you’re 18.
Robert Trout (29:14.085)
Yes.
Robert Trout (29:33.985)
Yep. Well, to me, and maybe this is how we close this out as far as like, where are we headed? You know, and for parent trainers, I see two distinct, and I’m sure there’s more, but there’s two very distinct.
Joanna Lilley (29:41.988)
Mm.
Robert Trout (29:49.41)
things that we’re looking to step in. And the first category is the, hey, don’t let this get bad. Wake up, educate yourself, build the skill and develop the process necessary to support your kid with their mental health and their developmental process and their brain and their et cetera, because this isn’t short term. Having a kid is a long-term process, it just is. So looking for that group.
And then the second group is the group that you and I have worked with for so long now, where it’s like, oh, you missed something. You know, and that doesn’t mean that it’s over. You know, that’s not a lost cause. It’s just in reality, it’s a lot harder. It’s a lot easier to step in the beginning because, you know, you’re, you’re doing the hard work up front to make life easier after. You know, it’s the easy hard or hard easy.
The reality is that the hard easy, doing the hard work up front makes the rest easier. But if you do easy hard, where it’s like you get into that new normal, that blinding kind of effect, and then one day you wake up and things are already in crisis or etc. Now you have to do, you know, it’s been very easy, but now the hard work is harder because there’s so much developed pattern and process and you know…
you know, crap within the family dynamic, right? Like there’s so much that needs to be done now. So either group where it’s like, okay, let’s get them early and set it up, or the, hey, you need hope. You know, you need to see that there is something you can do, even though they’re, you know, 17, 25, 39, it doesn’t matter. If you’re working with a loved one that’s struggling and it’s been that development, that’s where it’s like, okay, we’re gonna go back.
Joanna Lilley (31:20.4)
Mm-hmm.
Robert Trout (31:40.662)
and start working on these pieces, but you have to start doing that now. So to me, that’s my hope, is that parent trainers can target both of those groups and do it really well to help this group preemptively prevent crisis in the future, and help this group realize that there is a lot you can do. It’s not over. That’s gonna be super important, I think, for every family to understand is it’s not over.
Joanna Lilley (32:09.657)
Yeah.
Robert Trout (32:09.982)
It’s just, in reality, you have to do this work backwards. So, it’s gonna be interesting. I’m super excited about the project, super like, okay, what’s next? How do we do this? But there’s an endless stream of podcast ideas, my God. Ha ha ha.
Joanna Lilley (32:28.352)
right? Never ends. Well, I’m excited that this is officially launched, right? I think that’s, as a consultant, I can see the benefit to this for families out there. And I get, I mean, I still get…
I still get referrals for 15, 16, 17 year olds and families are like, I know it says that you only work with young adults, 18 and up, but are you sure you can’t help us? I’m like, yeah, I’m sure. But oh, by the way, like I’m the right type of person. I’m not the right person, but also like, if you’re not connected to some sort of parent resources, like go check this out. I think that’s also the benefit too, is that even the families that I don’t even.
Robert Trout (32:49.966)
I’m sorry.
Robert Trout (33:09.862)
Yep.
Joanna Lilley (33:14.232)
get on a phone call with, right? Or don’t even email me. Like that’s, yeah, there’s just a benefit or even like a bookend kind of, right? Like even if you don’t work with me, here’s this resource. And then even on the back end, sometimes I think it’s helpful to set parents up long after I’ve come and gone, if it did get to that crisis point, regardless of whether or not they worked with EHI or they were just kind of head in the sand during the treatment continuum. No, no, I don’t need help.
but I’m still sharing the resources on the back end. Like, oh, by the way, I’m out, right? Like I worked myself out of the job. That was the plan all along. But in case you continuously chose to ignore my broken record comments about how you as parents needed to also educate yourself, like really make some changes.
Robert Trout (33:48.557)
Yep.
Joanna Lilley (34:05.088)
your child, again, your young adult child has done a fantastic job, or ideally they’ve done a fantastic job, but now we all notice that it’s the parents that need you at their work. So it’s like, oh, by the way, I’m out as a consultant, and here’s this resource that I think you would, you know, when you’re ready, right? That pot of boiling water is still playing out, so let me know when it’s too hot in there, by the way, and then you can, you know, connect with parent trainers. But…
Robert Trout (34:20.525)
Yeah, when you’re ready.
Joanna Lilley (34:28.588)
It’s just beneficial for me to kind of share this all along the way. And again, I can’t say it enough. You have to position yourself as a business right now because the economy has shifted and I don’t, it’s not that parents don’t have money, right? That, that hasn’t necessarily changed. It’s just that everybody is way more fiscally conservative, right? In this moment, right? 20, 2023 into 2024, people are a little bit, you know,
Robert Trout (34:38.546)
I’m not sure if you can hear me.
Joanna Lilley (34:53.752)
holding their wallet closer to their body because they don’t want to part with anything unless they absolutely have to. So if you make this resource even more affordable for more families that again can afford it, but are just being a little bit conscientious of like what do I really want to spend my money on, then this is an amazing bang for their buck.
Robert Trout (35:14.568)
Yep, well we’re working to make it as affordable as we can there’s definitely that principle right where we have to charge enough to create Create more content quality product and to legitimately show up to support
all of these families on this continuum. So we’re trying, we’re doing our best and we’re going to keep adapting and kind of moving from there. So thank you for inspiring me in that conversation so long ago and kind of starting this whole like, okay, there’s something, there’s something here, there’s something that needs to be done. And
for creating this origin story over coffee and laughs. So thank you so much. And I look forward to hopefully having you on future episodes and kind of getting your take on working with families and different dynamics and things that we can hopefully help people with these episodes. And yeah, I look forward to whatever is about to happen.
Joanna Lilley (35:58.896)
Totally.
Joanna Lilley (36:17.496)
Yay! No, I’m so excited that this is launched. So, I’m happy to be a champion of the work that you’re doing.
Robert Trout (36:27.106)
Well, thank you so much and have a great day.
